Teens need responsibility. When parents do not individuate at around 7,8,9 for fear of losing their babies, it hinders the maturity. Then the child becomes anxious, fearful, irresponsible and we have the culture of “safe space.” As a single mother for several years, my kids had no choice but to help. It’s a great gift to watch them be strong, even if it scares you.
“We began seeing them not as productive but as gullible consumers.” Would that also mean being seen as product rather than productive and accomplishing production rather than consuming without abilities or talents to make goods and services happen?
Preach it! And don’t wait til the teen years to start. To quote perhaps the best pediatrician on substack, “ We are robbing our children of the space and freedom to mature by placing them in a state of constant, infantilizing surveillance, and then we’re diagnosing them with mental illness when they subsequently manifest symptoms of… immaturity”
One of my good friends, a stay at home dad 'garage physicist" type dude whose wife brought home the bacon, has a teenaged boy who is spending the summer watching two very young neighbor kids, for a price. They are out there, but the kids that are capable are being raised on the fringe.
This is one of the many things that suffered in part as a result of the move from rural to urban. On the farm or even growing up in a rural/farming community there was a real need for youth/teen labor. We were valued if we did a good job. Heck, our little school even recognized planting and harvest seasons when some of the kids would be out for a spell while the crop was handled (East TN). Folks were good about letting your parents know if they needed help on something if your boy could help. We didn't make much money, but it didn't take much then, either. Mostly we learned how to work and do a good job. And mostly, it stuck.
I think this is more of an urban phenomenon than a rural one. We were on the fringe of a small city for over 20 years, where the city was more like suburbia than downtown. There was a downtown where folks could go, and it was under a two mile walk for most city dwellers. At our fringe and beyond, there were farms and just folks who didn't want to live in the ultra-liberal city. The difference between the city folks and the non-city folks was noticeable, as were their infrequent clashes in the high school. When the School Superintendent pointed out that there were more clashes between city and rural than between black and white, and took steps to correct it, she was branded a racist by the professional victimologists in the city. And in this particular ultra-liberal small city, there were as many white victimologists as black.
At any rate, we saw plenty of responsibility in the non-urban teens.
Things like Boy Scouts and male mentors had a lot to do with that early maturing process, but we know what happened to those mechanisms. Pedos killed them.
Both my daughters worked at a ymca Day camp in high school and college and I was so impressed with them. They had family night on Thursdays and our girls always wanted us to come once a summer. And like you said they totally ran the place and with authority. I think it’s absolutely one of the best things they did as teenagers and young adults.
Homeschool those kids! We are in our second generation of doing so. The bigs herd the littles no matter own family size. Despite degrees and graduate ones, it makes economic sense.
If there’s an amusement park or water park, those jobs are still being held by teenagers. Though if the rollercoasters still have manual breaking, you have to be 18 to tun those. In my area, both are right on the rural / suburban line, and it’s usually the rural kids taking the jobs.
I was a lifeguard at 16. Moved onto WSI by 18 and also taught scuba at 19. My children did the same. My daughter ran the waterfront at a camp while in college and her brothers worked at the pool or ran them as young adults. All 4 have grown up to be very responsible accomplished adults. I am glad that my oldest grandchild is a day camp counsellor at 15. The education one receives by being responsible is unmatched.
Not sure they still run it, but 25 years or so, the UNT ran a school for high school students where they took college classes and did research in the labs, including doing that as a summer job. Most successfully took the same classes as kids 4 years older and their lab-work wasn't any worse than the normal undergraduates.
Of course, these days newspapers are delivered by adults, lawns are cut by illegals, etc. Don't know about babysitters. Unless their family has a business or a farm (ranch), a kid is unlikely to find work and I wonder how many of them go to college.
Another great reflection on the state of our culture. Like many of the other commenters, my teen years were spent helping a family business, and I learned about hard work and fiscal responsibility by helping out - there was no other viable alternative. My peers and I sought out ways to learn and gain more skills because it meant more respect and money for us. The current state which mostly insulates kids from basic work in favor of internships at companies and non profits seemed like such a good idea. Maybe not. Teenagers are truly adults in training, and we should all realize that and act accordingly.
I babysat for two cousins when they were small. I had a paper route by 6th grade. In winter I used to stop at a funeral parlor on my route. They guys were friendly and always inviting to come back for dinner. They said they were having liver. Then, as a high schooler, I worked in Kennedy's drug store. I was the only Kennedy associated with it. Always had a job. My kids, not so much.
Teens need responsibility. When parents do not individuate at around 7,8,9 for fear of losing their babies, it hinders the maturity. Then the child becomes anxious, fearful, irresponsible and we have the culture of “safe space.” As a single mother for several years, my kids had no choice but to help. It’s a great gift to watch them be strong, even if it scares you.
Or you could add uniforms and storm some island stronghold in the Pacific with rest of a group of teenagers...
Absolutely.
though it would require you to show them how to safely operate scary gun things :)
The way things are going with China, that could happen.
I hit like because I think you're right but I don't want to like
Yeah, get them killed to make the world safe for a future USMC full of trannies.
“We began seeing them not as productive but as gullible consumers.” Would that also mean being seen as product rather than productive and accomplishing production rather than consuming without abilities or talents to make goods and services happen?
Preach it! And don’t wait til the teen years to start. To quote perhaps the best pediatrician on substack, “ We are robbing our children of the space and freedom to mature by placing them in a state of constant, infantilizing surveillance, and then we’re diagnosing them with mental illness when they subsequently manifest symptoms of… immaturity”
Let your kids play free this summer! More here:
https://thefederalist.com/2022/06/16/let-your-kids-go-without-adults-and-shoes-this-summer/
Parents need to know it’s not about them, it’s about raising children for the real world. Teach them to engage not fear.
One of my good friends, a stay at home dad 'garage physicist" type dude whose wife brought home the bacon, has a teenaged boy who is spending the summer watching two very young neighbor kids, for a price. They are out there, but the kids that are capable are being raised on the fringe.
This is one of the many things that suffered in part as a result of the move from rural to urban. On the farm or even growing up in a rural/farming community there was a real need for youth/teen labor. We were valued if we did a good job. Heck, our little school even recognized planting and harvest seasons when some of the kids would be out for a spell while the crop was handled (East TN). Folks were good about letting your parents know if they needed help on something if your boy could help. We didn't make much money, but it didn't take much then, either. Mostly we learned how to work and do a good job. And mostly, it stuck.
I think this is more of an urban phenomenon than a rural one. We were on the fringe of a small city for over 20 years, where the city was more like suburbia than downtown. There was a downtown where folks could go, and it was under a two mile walk for most city dwellers. At our fringe and beyond, there were farms and just folks who didn't want to live in the ultra-liberal city. The difference between the city folks and the non-city folks was noticeable, as were their infrequent clashes in the high school. When the School Superintendent pointed out that there were more clashes between city and rural than between black and white, and took steps to correct it, she was branded a racist by the professional victimologists in the city. And in this particular ultra-liberal small city, there were as many white victimologists as black.
At any rate, we saw plenty of responsibility in the non-urban teens.
Things like Boy Scouts and male mentors had a lot to do with that early maturing process, but we know what happened to those mechanisms. Pedos killed them.
Both my daughters worked at a ymca Day camp in high school and college and I was so impressed with them. They had family night on Thursdays and our girls always wanted us to come once a summer. And like you said they totally ran the place and with authority. I think it’s absolutely one of the best things they did as teenagers and young adults.
Homeschool those kids! We are in our second generation of doing so. The bigs herd the littles no matter own family size. Despite degrees and graduate ones, it makes economic sense.
If there’s an amusement park or water park, those jobs are still being held by teenagers. Though if the rollercoasters still have manual breaking, you have to be 18 to tun those. In my area, both are right on the rural / suburban line, and it’s usually the rural kids taking the jobs.
I was a lifeguard at 16. Moved onto WSI by 18 and also taught scuba at 19. My children did the same. My daughter ran the waterfront at a camp while in college and her brothers worked at the pool or ran them as young adults. All 4 have grown up to be very responsible accomplished adults. I am glad that my oldest grandchild is a day camp counsellor at 15. The education one receives by being responsible is unmatched.
Not sure they still run it, but 25 years or so, the UNT ran a school for high school students where they took college classes and did research in the labs, including doing that as a summer job. Most successfully took the same classes as kids 4 years older and their lab-work wasn't any worse than the normal undergraduates.
Of course, these days newspapers are delivered by adults, lawns are cut by illegals, etc. Don't know about babysitters. Unless their family has a business or a farm (ranch), a kid is unlikely to find work and I wonder how many of them go to college.
Another great reflection on the state of our culture. Like many of the other commenters, my teen years were spent helping a family business, and I learned about hard work and fiscal responsibility by helping out - there was no other viable alternative. My peers and I sought out ways to learn and gain more skills because it meant more respect and money for us. The current state which mostly insulates kids from basic work in favor of internships at companies and non profits seemed like such a good idea. Maybe not. Teenagers are truly adults in training, and we should all realize that and act accordingly.
That’s probably what freaks liberals out when they go to ChickFilA: they’ve never seen so many teenagers acting responsibly.
I babysat for two cousins when they were small. I had a paper route by 6th grade. In winter I used to stop at a funeral parlor on my route. They guys were friendly and always inviting to come back for dinner. They said they were having liver. Then, as a high schooler, I worked in Kennedy's drug store. I was the only Kennedy associated with it. Always had a job. My kids, not so much.